Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu

Hey friends! Hope all is well with each of you. A little cooler weather but still showing close to 100+ for the next 10 days. Yuck!!!

Going a little different direction today. Life is a very fascinating journey. I continue to be reminded how life happens, life changes and there are so many things that can impact our life and we had no choice in the matter.

I want to try and quickly tell you about 2 men. One is a very close friend that I have nothing but love and respect for. The other is a very special man that my first encounter with gave me a perspective about life that was very powerful. Mark is my good friend that I could write pages and pages of stories I have had with him. Octavio is a man I knew, a man who helped me see myself and life with a new perspective. Octavio was Marks BJJ Master and his good friend.

I met Mark in 2014. He and Kim were a part a a pre-marriage group I lead. He and I quickly made a good connection. Several times he invited me to come and try some martial arts. I was very interested and if honest was uncomfortable and scared. I have been a pretty good athlete all my life and was in great shape, but the martial arts were very intimidating for me.

I agreed to do some of that with Mark and we started with Jeet Kune Do. This was the martial arts that was developed and came from Bruce Lee. Enjoyed that, trained with Mark and pretty quickly started working with a group he taught. Was not as intimidating as I thought it would be and I was enjoying.

Mark continued to encourage Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu. The idea of that one continued to be incredibly intimidating.

Finally I started that Gi discipline but was only working with Mark to get started. I had mentally agreed with myself that I would submit to his leadership in that area and see where that would go.

He called me one day when I was driving and said he wanted me to come to an event that was happening at his martial arts school. He and Octavio were promoting some students. I thought that would pretty cool to see and I told him, “I could be there.” He then said, I want you to wear your gi. I quickly said, “I will be there but no reason to wear my gi.” His response was, “I want you to wear your gi.” I remembered that I had personally committed to his leadership in that area and said, “okay, I will wear my gi.”

I showed up and tried to get over in the corner and hide. He and Octavio promoted several students. Then Octavio said “now we will train.” I was not expecting that. This started with the high belts and the rest of us were watching. I tried to start moving over to the exit door. I quickly go interested in when Octavio and James Brown were rolling together. I did not know James at that time but those two were, I believe the highest ranked men that day and watching them was fascinating.

That group eventually finished and Octavio then said, it was now time for the lower belts to go. That was so intimidating, I slowly started trying to get to the door and not be seen. I was odd man out and a big group got started on the floor. Once again. I was so grateful and trying to figure out how to slide out the door.

Octavio was on the other side of the mat. He seemed to notice me and that was a little uncomfortable. He walked across the mat and said to me. “You not roll?” My response was. “I am just getting started and I don’t have a clue how to do this.” He reached over took a hold of my gi and said, “let’s roll.” I said again, “I have no idea how to do this.” He pulled on my gi and said “let’s roll.”

He and I got down on the floor, he explained a few things and said. Let’s roll, we did the hand tap thing and I was still thinking, “what am I doing?” I thought I don’t want this guys to think I am a big weenie. I decided I would make a little lung at him, try to get him wrapped up and see where that might go. I did that and I heard him say, “no, no no.” I let go and raised back up. He explained a few things. Basically why you never want to start the way I just did. We started again and that turned in one of the most powerful and unique experiences I have ever had.

He and I started on one side of the floor. He explained several basic things and talked me through that roll. When our time was up we were on the other side of the mat. We sat up and he explained a few things, told me that I had done a great job. During that roll it was like he and I were the only two in that room. I never thought about anybody watching, wondering who the heck I was and seeing I did not have a clue about jiu-jitsu.

I got up and walked over to Mark. I told him I needed to take off and process some of what just happened. Mark ask if I enjoyed. I said yes and he said he was glad I was there.

I know that is along story and to be honest this has so much more to share than jiu-jitsu.

Professor Octavio Couto passed away last week in Italy. Not sure anyone knows the details, but he fell off a wall, probably hit his head on the rock shoreline and ended up in the ocean. A very tragic way to end his life!

I am not a fan of death. I also know it is always part of this life for each of us. There are always men like Octavio who are making a difference in the world and out of no where they are gone. It’s hard to know what to do with that.

I cannot say enough. Octavio made a huge difference in my life in a very unique way. I believe he has impacted lives of men and women all around the world. I also believe after his death there will be some of those men and women who take his loss and it will encourage and empower them to take his gift and go share it with others.

Maybe men like Octavio help us begin to understand, “life matters.” We need more of that in a world that is very broken.

Let me shift to Mark Reding. If I am completely honest my friendship with Mark has grown way past jiu-jitsu. Mark and I have talked so much about this life and how we can continue to be more of the men we were created to be. He and I have often talked about the challenges of that. But the focus with Mark has always been to “be more.” Those friendships with men have always been very important to me but not always easy to find.

Mark and Octavio had a unique and special connection. Octavio understood what it means and the journey to be “A True Martial Art Artist.” He taught and modeled to Mark the truth of that. Artist in Martial Arts, that is a very small group. I believe my friend Mark is on that journey! His Master Octavio Couto has taught Mark well!!!

I am so grateful for Octavio. My first experience with him was a life changing perspective for me. The way he impacted my friend Mark is a gift that Mark has taken seriously. Mark will continue to impact many, many men and women.

Always, Always Remember,,,,,,, You Are Loved And Of Great Value!!!!!!!!!!!!!!