“SUFFERING”
Happy Monday! Was so great to experience the sunshine yesterday and grateful for some warmer weather this week. Hope you have some big plans for the week and you each survived last weeks winter weather without too many problems. Maybe some of last weeks weather issues connect with a thought this morning.
The radiation clinic was shut down until Friday last week. So I went 6 days with no radiation. I had already been feeling much better the week before and last week felt about as well as I have since I started radiation. I was very encouraged, grateful and excited about future stuff. Then Friday happened. I went back to radiation that morning. By Friday afternoon I was having some of the worst headaches I have had through this entire process. I was miserable, could hardly sleep Friday night and Saturday was another ruff day!
The headaches and fatigue are part of the radiation, chemotherapy process, so that’s not a big shocker. What I realized was, the physical suffering, was really impacting my “mindset!” That is a big deal and something I try hard to stay on top of and maintain a positive mindset. I have been able to get a reset this morning. I have also been reminded in my life and so many others that life simply is hard sometimes. When life is hard it is easy to get into a negative mindset.
So, here is an example for me of how God shows up for me and really encourages and bless’s me. Please remember, this happens for each of us in many different ways. I am never saying this is how you should do or experience this. I certainly want you to consider and think about ways you experience encouragement and blessing.
I love music. Always have. When I was six or seven we went to a teenagers house after school on days my mom was working in a hair salon. This girl had a single 45 record disc of “American Pie” by Don McLean. I would listen to that song over and over. It has always been my favorite song. Back then I had no idea what the song was about. Don has never gone into much detail about the song but I believe it was a song about grief and written out of his own grief. His dad had died and Buddy Holly one of his favorite music artist had died in a tragic plane wreck. I believe American Pie is a song about grief and as a 7-8 year old I was walking in grief because of my father’s death. Didn’t understand that then, but makes a lot of sense today.
Back to this morning. I had music playing while I was reading. I got pulled into the lyrics of, “when the world becomes too much, near the cross I will remain.” I stopped reading and simply listened to the song. The next lines that grabbed me, “Mercy is falling, falling, lift up your hands receive it now. Your in the presence of the Lord!”
So at this point I am in tears and genuinely experiencing the presence, mercy, love and grace of God. I needed that desperately today. Then I glanced at a picture my sister Andrea had painted me. I believe I have mentioned before, but it so connected with that song this morning.
You can interoperate the picture in many ways. This morning I saw, lifting my wounded heart up with open hands and my broken heart experiencing the presence and mercy of Jesus. I am broken in so many ways. When I focus on that I can get into a negative mindset. I am also loved and of great value to the God of creation. More than ever I need to live more in that reality.
Today, are there areas life is kicking you in the butt? Are there some very real struggles and challenges that seem overwhelming at times? I am afraid that is the reality of living in a fallen world. Maybe, just maybe there is some truth to this song.
“When the world become too much, near the cross I will remain!!!”
You truly are “loved and of great value.” Remember, remind yourself that truth and have a beautiful Monday.
Peace,